Just the other day i was asking Nabil, how does he feel going to school nowadays, and he answered school is okay as he has more friends now and he gets to run around the school with his gang during recess. I was so so relieved to hear that and thus it brought back memories of his first month in Std 1.
The eve before he was supposed to start his first day in Primary 1, he approached my hubby and went 'Abah, betul ke besok Abil dah darjah 1?' We were dumbfounded. We didn't see it coming as we thought he was so ready for school. And my hubby went Darn! We sure gonna face lots of problems with him tomorrow morning.
True enough, the next morning he had difficulty waking up, dragged his two feet into the bathroom with dissatisfaction look plastered on his face.
Hubby took the day off to send Kakak and Nabil to school. According to my hubby, the school was swarmed with eager parents sending their children off to school. Nabil was seated at the back of the classroom and he looked nervous and miserable. The first 2 days my hubby took the liberty in making sure he is settled in this new environment.
As I knew that I may need to be checking my son in Std 1 from time to time, I requested that my timetable to be free from 9.30 to 11.00 for the first month. So on the third day onwards I went off to see him in school, to check on him and buying things needed from the bookshop. I was told to wait in the canteen and at 10.10 I watched him coming out in the classroom, alone, looking bored and unhappy. He was stuck to me all the time during recess, all the time holding my hands when i had to go to the bookshop to get him his stuff. His ex kindi friends greeted but he didn't bother to greet them back. I thought he was being macho, little did I know that he was actually feeling miserable inside.
So after recess, it was time for me to bid him farewell, he kissed me on my hand and cheeks, i told him to get inside him classroom and as i was above to wave him goodbye, i saw tears welling up at the corner of his eyes. I asked him what's wrong? but he just shook his head. He looked devastated and he made me feel bad (for sending him to school). The next 2 days, the same thing happened, everytime i had to go back, there will always be tears in his eyes.
The week after, parents were no longer allowed in the school compound even during recess, so he survived the second week but he was still a loner, he didn't bother to make new friends. The third week, he looked a bit better and I asked 'Do you like school now?' and this was his answer 'Ok. I look forward to P.E, Music and Recess.' I tried to keep a straight face but i could feel my face twitched to a smile. A week later he added 'Ibu, Abil suka sekolah sebab ada p.j, muzik, rehat dan balik. Pas tu hari jumaat paling abil suka sebab ada wushu.'
So to know that he looks forward to school and that he has friends now, shows that we had made the right choice in sending him off to school in the first place. ahak ahak.
3 comments:
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It must have been difficult to let him go when all you wanted to do was to hold him in your arms. Maternal instinct or not, sometimes we have to bite the sour apple and lepaskan sikit sikit.
There are many bridges ahead for them and for us too.
Kak Naz, you're so right. It was difficult to let go and the fact he was miserable made it even harder. All we wanted is to raise happy kids and to see them unhappy, makes us sad.
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