Monday, May 31, 2010

You are the Sweetest

You are the sweetest because:-

1. When I told you my watch doesn't work and I had to wear the expensive special watch you bought on a daily basis, you brought me to the watch shop and got me another pair, I thought of getting a simpler one but you were very concerned that I am truly satisfied with the choice I make.

2. When I told you, I don't have many jeans to wear because I'm getting healthier and healthier day by day, instead of telling me to exercise or lose weight, you bought me another pair with no question asked.

3. When I told you that I charged the card during my trip to Langkawi on top of the pocket money you gave me which you thought was adequate for my shopping spree, you just asked 'how much?' and nothing else after that.

4. When bibik is not around, you take us all to dine outside just because you know how helpless I am in the kitchen.

5. When you have extra money you always think about what to get me and the kids and not much of yourself.

6. When I say I'm tired or not in a mood to go out, you don't mind handling the kids all by yourself.

7. When I say I would like to go for facial,cut my hair, you don't mind paying for it.

8. When I say I need to attend to my farm, you don't mind putting the baby to bed so I can do my farm with ease. ahak ahak.

9. When something goes wrong, like when I knocked the car couple of times you seldom put the blame on me.

10. You handle all the bills and file everything and I know nuts about all these things.

I'm truly blessed. Darling my thanks can be overrated but I believe I can never thanked you enough for making everything easy for me.

Sunday, May 23, 2010

The Langkawi Trip

Ok so the Langkawi trip was last weekend. To me, it was a blast because I was travelling with my good friends and the cherry on the cake was that, we were all roommates, how cool is that?

Anyway from the Langkawi trip I can actually summed up few things. Among them are:-

1. never have I laughed so much in the past 10 years. Oh yeah we had loads of fun.
Travelling with friends makes me feel young again. I'm not wearing any hat,
I was just me, not a mother, not a daughter, not a teacher, not a wife. It was
awesome to lead such carefree life once in awhile.

2. never have I shopped for chocolates that much. The damage? I'm not
telling. ahak ahak. That bad ok, I lacked the self-control.

3. never have I sang in public before, I'm not sure what made me, but I was hyped
up that night and sang a dangdut number. I was terrible but my horrendous
'gelek' made up for my ugly voice.

4. I had a lot of energy, though I didn't sleep that well for the 2 nights I was
there, I wasn't tired. Amazing? I was amazed at myself too.

Now I know what I need to make me feel good, go traveling with the girls. We should do this again.Who's with me?

Me and my girlfriends

Will upload more photos once I get the memory card from a friend, hopefully.

Friday, May 21, 2010

Man with no legs and arms - Inspiring story

This is truly inspirational. Every time, when I'm feeling down or when I think life has been unfair to me, I'll view this video and all my problems suddenly become insignificant and are just minor. It definitely changed me to be more thankful and grateful with what I have and I hope it will do the same to you too.

Sunday, May 9, 2010

Good Mothers Don't Do Such Thing?

I was watching Oprah today, tribute on mother's day, how this mother named Brenda left her 2 year-old daughter at the back seat of her MPV for 8  hours and eventually killed her as she suffered from heat stroke, her skin was peeling and her mouth had produced white foam.  How could a mother forget her own child?  Does that make her a bad mother?  Are we the best judge to say that she is incapable of taking good care of her kids?  Apparently not, turned out she is such a loving and a caring mom who was just unlucky that this mishap could happen to her.

Brenda a career woman who leads such a hectic life, on top of her demanding job, she goes home to attend to her 2 small kids, cooks and cleans the house.  That day, there was a slight change to her routine.  Usually it was the husband's job to send the kids to the sitter, however, on that tragic day he had a dental appointment that morning so the duty was shifted to Brenda.  The child was still asleep when she picked her up and put her into the backseat of her car.  As it was way too early to send the child to the sitter, she decided to get some stuff as  she normally did, she reached her workplace, began unloading her stuff and as she held a very demanding job she had totally forgotten the baby who was still asleep, left in the car.  She felt something was amiss but couldn't put what into it until it was almost 4 pm when everybody was about to go home when a friend suddenly came running to her saying that she has left her baby in a car.  She knew then it was too late.  She was traumatized by the whole incident, all the time blaming herself and it didn't help either when society started pointing to her and call her a bad mother.  She then lead a solitary life for a year before she finally agreed to be interviewed by Oprah on what had actually happened on that day.  In her interview with Oprah, what caught my attention was when she said 'good mothers don't do such thing'.

This incident could happen to anybody, am guilty of that too.  Mondays are usually my busiest day,  I usually get home at 5.30 pm after my orchestra practices.  There was this one Monday early this year, I had to attend to so many things, can't remember what they were.  I remember that day being unfocus as my mind wondered to too many things that required my attention.  At that period, Hilman has to undergo a few sessions of therapy on a daily basis.  As the centre closed at 6.30 pm, I rushed to get home to pick up Hilman and my mother.  Parking in that area was horrendous, after making a few rounds I told my mom to get down first.  I think after almost 15 minutes, I found a spot which was about 100 metres away from the centre.  I quickly went down, ran to the centre to secure my son a place when my mother asked me where Hilman is.  I could feel my blood draining as I have totally forgotten about Hilman left on the backseat of my car.  I ran back to the car and I could see him sweating and crying at the top of his lungs. I quickly grabbed him into my arms, showering him with kisses and whispering sweet nothings to his ear.  I was so thankful that he was alright.  But I felt really bad.  I was a bad mother who have failed to protect and to care for my kid.  And when I got back to the centre, I could see people shaking their heads, 'tsk'ing me and went 'how could she forget her own baby?'.  The feeling was awful as I could not defend myself as I was truly guilty.

So when I was watching Oprah this afternoon, I could relate to Brenda, and I believe I am not alone, I bet there are other mothers out there too who have experience quite similar situation too, like forgetting to pick up their kids from school, tuition or the child suddenly went out of our sight.  I am not justifying myself, what I did was definitely wrong and intolerable but actually there are many factors contribute a mother to such act.

Being a mother is one tough job, as she has to oversee to almost everything, people expect a mother not to lack in her job, there is no room for mistake, though many of us try to achieve to be the perfect mother, at the end of the day there is no such thing as a perfect mother.

So to all mothers out there, I advise you, maybe to slow down a little, take time to breathe and we can only achieve certain things at a certain time, we make mistakes, the most important thing is to pick up the pieces and learn from the mistakes we made.  After all we are all human, we are bound to make mistakes.

Happy Mother's Day!!!!

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

People Change

I was looking at my ex-high school friends photos and I was thinking to myself how I will never fit into the party.  I felt sad (no, not sad, I'm not sure what I'm feeling) but there's this tight knot feeling in my stomach that I cannot actually express what the feeling is.  Am I making any sense here?

You know it is the kind of feeling you get when you remember how close you were with these people, how you laughed, fought, cried, shared your secrets and how so much in common you had with these people, how you used to have so much to talk about and suddenly now you feel that there is a distance in your relationship with them, how these people once you called your good friends are now in a different league than you are.

Now that I am more matured than I used to be, I feel that when some people say they have never changed doesn't really mean good news to me,  because I cringe now when I see my thirty year old friends talk or dress like they are still eighteen, how they still talk about fashion and still get excited about men, how the still go partying at night whereas I mull over mundane things like what to cook for dinner, how to be a good mother/wife or how to raise obedient children. Maybe I have changed so much and I am now no longer a fun person to hang out with.

Just a couple months back, I had the opportunity to bump into another of one my closest high school friends through facebook and how ecstatic I was when we decided to meet over a cuppa.  Here I was jumping to the idea of finally meeting my good old friend but the meeting felt so strange as it turned out that we didn't have nothing much to talk about. We had some awkward moments as we did not have an expanded conversation, the silence was uncomfortable that I just couldn't wait to finish off my coffee and bid my farewell.  I am not sure what has happened to us, but she sounded bitter, she has all the not-so-nice thing to say about other people, the country, the law, the kids school, the husband basically about everything and the injustice that is happening around the world and that just killed my mood. In other words, I cannot utter a single thing without her having some negative remarks to make, in less than half an hour she somehow has managed to change the happy-go-lucky me into a pessimistic, unhappy and ungrateful being.  From that moment onwards, we no longer chat in facebook and I try my best not to cross her path.  It is funny come to think of it how I used to enjoy her company, a person I used to run to when I have anything to share.

Whatever it  is those mentioned above are just a few of them as I am still blessed with wonderful friends around me.  I am ME when I am with them and I like the ME in me when I am in their company.  Darn!  Pardon me, if I still don't make any sense here as this is the ME that I am referring about.  Get me?

Ahak ahak.  Have a good day.