I was just reading a blog of a good friend of mine and the topic is on marital issue and how men tend to easily forget his responsibility when he is involved with another woman. It's not something new we have heard it overtimes on how men cheated on his wife and vice versa, but this issue never fails to make people get angry easily, and as woman we do feel for the wife. The fact that some men who go astray are not financially sound, tends to make your blood boils as these men who are still dependant on the wife to settle some of utility bills, have the heart to find another. Like a friend said 'ko syok2 sorang and ko expect your wife to understand that this is takdir' is a total bullshit. I am sorry,there's no nice word to describe what you have done.
Funny enough when I talked this issue with some men, they could highlight it 'maybe it was a small mistake' or 'dah nak jadi bukan dicari' and they would further broach the topic by saying like 'Inilah masalah perempuan kesalahan kecil suami dia, dia dah tak ingat dah semua benda baik yang suami dia dah buat'. Kesalahan kecil? Have a fling for another woman is a MAJOR mistakes in a marriage, tak kiralah suka-suka ke or takde benda ke, but it is definitely not kesalahan kecil. It is a MAJOR no-no ok? This thing which you think happens to be nothing can get real messy, many hearts will be broken definitely not yours but the family the wife and the kids. Many people will get hurt, her side of the family and even your side of the family, the one that is takde apa2 and syok is you yourself, you selfish brat! So please don't label it as a small mistake although you have repent, the hurt is just too much, the wound is too deep even time may not fully healed the injury that you have done.
So my plea to all men out there
1. instead of using your free time -imagining other things that involve sex can you please use your time wisely on how to earn extra money for the family so you can lead a better life for example.
2. so if you are filthy rich - can you please think on how to raise your kids to be manusia yang berguna kepada agama, bangsa dan negara. Nurturing it's not suppose to be one sided- it's not the mother's job per se but both the parents.
3. and if you are not - instead of watching tv and reading newspaper and thinking of the unthinkable can you please make a point to help your wife around the house.
4. and can you please think on how to be a good or a better husband/father to your wife and kids. Only then you would want to achieve a better quality life for your family and I believe if you are this type of husband/father you will have no time to think about other women and go astray.
Can you do that please?
4 comments:
Yeay, Kak Puteq !!!
Hahaha Myra,
topik ni memang menjadi isu hangat dan cepat buat i naik darah.
Apa yang cik puan ceritakan itu adalah benar saya setuju betul dgn cik puan tapi kaum wanita pun ada yg bersifat begitu, kita tak bolih berpihak pada yg lain ini semua saperti pepatah kata:-tak kan lah bertepok sebelah tangan.
Kadang kala kaum wanita pun punya kesilapan maklumlah soal rumah tangga ni amat rumit skali, pada pandangan zahir kita tengok suami/isteri itu elok tetapi di-se balik tabir di-dalam rumah tiada siapa yang tahu apa yang telah terjadi kepada pasangan itu hanya tuhan saja yang mengetahui. Jadi pada pendapat saya kita tidak mempunyai kuasa untuk membuat keputusan dari segi zahir dari mata kasar apa yang berlaku disebalik tabir kecuali kita dengar kepada kedua2 pihak cerita yang sebenar menyebabkan perkara ini bolih berlaku sewenang2nya.
We do not have the right to make judgement on anyone or everyone cos we too are not that perfect.
Only Allah knows the best, what goes around comes around.
what u had said is mostly tru however as being said also by ab we just cant make any judgement just by looking at the off set of the situations..most of the time i do agree that we men normally go out of proportions and find ways and means to justify the actions...but deep in my heart i truly believe that most marriages are of "terpaksa" in nature and cuoples get married without knowing the meaning of the marriage itself..most marriages are of infectionates and love at first site..couples living in fantasy and illusions as thought that everything is ok...nobody wants to rocck the boat and keep on living as pretenders..you get older and wiser and should be able to value life more..yes in order to achieve the unthinkable something that we call tru love...sacrifices and lots and lots of people will be hurt by the actions..its just that u need to believe in yourself and trully believe that there is "kaseh sebenar" apart for the love to Allah
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